Dev Appreciation Day

Hello my lovelies!
My exams are done, done, DONE!
-Mahi does a happy jig-

Ok, Ok, you're probably wondering what the title is about.

My loyal readers probably know by now who this Dev fella is.

For those of you who don't know, let me tell you the story.

Once upon a time, a girl called Mahima took her (lovely, adorable) dog Kelso to the groomers. Her lovely friend Arpeeta was entertaining a family friend from Melbourne- Dev. They decided to stop by the groomers to say 'Hello'. They stopped by and I was immediately struck by what a pleasant person this 'Dev' seemed to be.

He was quite a bright, amiable young man. A few minutes into meeting me, he turned around to 'check out some doggie baskets'.
But I got the distinct feeling he was giving Arpu and me some time to have some silent girly talk about him.

I was right. I flashed Arpu a 'thumbs up'* sign, which he caught (but covered it up with feigned ignorance...nice job Dev!)
*Guys reading this - you've all been 'thumbs up-ed' or 'thumbs down-ed' or 'so-so-ed' at least ONCE in your lifetime. Trust me.

Anyway after that we started chatting and soon enough we became pretty tight buddies.

I remember, the turning point was when, quite early into our budding friendship, I asked him a question that's been known to either make or break a friendship-
Me: Dev, would you happen...to watch....'Star Trek'?
Dev: Why would you ask me that?
Me: Haha, nevermind! It's silly, I just got the feeling that you were a trekkie..its stupid...forget I asked..
Dev: I LOVE 'Star Trek' mate!


This blog entry has been a long time in the making..

I'd like to mark today as 'Dev Appreciation Day'.
I'm appreciating a friend, a buddy, a confidante, a fellow toilet joker, a fellow perv today.

We met almost a year back around this time.
Dev, you've been an amazing friend.
You've given me some sound advice that's helped me immensely, you understood about the depression I went through before turning 21 (even when almost everyone thought I was going nuts), you showed three Singaporean girls an amazing time in Melbourne, you've made me think, you forced me to blog and you've made me laugh loads (mostly at you) .

I'm glad we met at the groomers that day, if we hadn't, I'd have missed out on a friend for life.

Dev summed it up perfectly- People, go out, meet someone new..make a FRIEND, stretch out that friendly hand ( but don't get too friendly), flash a smile (JUST a smile..don't flash anything waist below) and say "Hello!" (but not in a pervy way...or in a pervy way..whatever works for you.)
Kids do it everyday, we all seem to grow up too fast and fall out of the habit.















(Me, Dev, Arpeeta, Mink @ 3 Degrees in Melbourne)

Yo why you gotta be trippin' on me?

Well three exams down, only 2 more miserable ones to go!

I went in for my exam today all psyched up.
I bought myself two, not one but TWO new pens and a bottle a of Snapple (Raspberry Cranberry).
So I sat down to do my paper when suddenly I had an urge.
An urge to visit the little girl's room.
It was a pretty strong urge.


So I asked to go out and in my eagerness to waste as little time as possible, I run up the staircase of the lecture theatre, one (lovely, long) leg in front of the other.....aaaaaand I trip.
Gracefully.
(Of course!)

Twice. Not once but TWICE.

Imagine a huge lecture theatre, deathly silent and suddenly -
THUNK. -scramble- THUNK.
"Fuck."
(I'm hoping everyone was too busy concentrating on their papers to notice that I tripped. But I DID hear a couple of sniggers...from the invigilators. Assholes.)

Also since I finished my paper 5 minutes earlier, I made some interesting albeit slightly odd observations-

• There's always the guy whom you think is cute, until you suddenly realise he's had a smile plastered on his face throughout the exam. Not an nice sexy, flirty one...a psycho smile.What gives? He's smiling to HIMSELF. No one enjoys an exam that much (well *pfft* if he was smiling at me, that would be an enitrely different story.) Not cute anymore. The search continues.
• There's always the slacker who enters 10 minutes late, gets his paper, stares at it, zones out and leaves the exam hall 10 minutes later.
• There's always an invigilator with terrible B.O. And he makes it a point to walk past you at least 58 times.
• There's always the girl who looks like she's having a meltdown.

In other news, my eye is still red.
I still feel incredibly unattractive, as a result.

Oh, also, my lovely friend Arpeeta is landing here tomorrow. I am SOOOO excited!
(Mostly coz Dev has sent many episodes of 'Battlestar Galactica' through her, for me to watch. Hehe Thanks Dev!)

Arpu, Arpu you're so sweet
Even with your smelly feet!
More than you, there's no one fittah!
Now gimme my 'Battlestar Galactica'!

Yea baby yea! Keep those roses coming!
*Takes a bow*

A 'Wtf' Moment or two

(Kelso, 1 month)

A Series of Unfortunate events.

Turns out poor Kelso has colitis. Don't ask me HOW. The guy eats better food than we do.
You will be happy to know, however, that he is on his way to recovery.

My bad hair days are back.
Yes.
But that has taken a backseat in my Car of Anxiety. I am frantic with worry because my right eye has turned RED.

RED.

As much as I try to convince myself that I look dangerous and sexy with one red eye, I have to admit, that that is a blatant outright dirty lie.
I look AWFUL!
I think its due to my studying.

Much to everyones surprise (and mine) I am actually putting in many, many hours of studying. It has come to my attention that I am, in fact, royally screwed for an upcoming exam- 'Language and Cognitive Processes'. Toast sounds less dry than that. And I feel, when compared, I probably know more about rocket science.

The other day my Dad said "I can't believe I'm saying this to you, but please take a break."
For those of you who know my Dad, he's the one who's always saying
"How was your day? Study-free? Great! Good! Keep it up."
Positively dripping with sarcasm.

My mother has discovered the joys of musicindiaonline.com.
This is not good.
I am constantly bombarded with requests to play her favourite hindi movie music.
It's driving me NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Look, look before you start calling me a bigot against my own kind, lemme tell you..I like Hindi music as much as the next Indian does. But too much of a good thing, is well...a bad thing.

I have also had cravings for ice cream. Maybe its the exam mood thats inducing a need for feel-good food. Today I whined like a pregnant woman until my brother was forced to go out and get me a tub of Ben & Jerry's 'Phish Food'.
The whining was SO worth it.
They have dark chocolate fishes.
'Nuff said. *blissful smile*
God Bless America. There's a place for Ben and Jerry in heaven.

I haven't caught the Harry Potter flick but, majority of those who have watched it, seem to hate it. With a vengeance.
*Shrugs* I don't know..condensing a 400-something paged book ain't no walk in the park, if ya know what ah mean?

Also, some meanie commented at the previous post and said I was 'nauseatingly patronising'.
*taps fingers on the table*
Well?
If you're as smart as I am, you probably went "Haha!...Now what?"
Exactly.

Anyway, the point is
1) I can be nauseatingly patronising when I want to be.
2) The meanie obviously seems to have done his/her thorough research on what makes me tick.
3) The meanie sucks ASS
4) I've cursed you meanie. I hope someone calls YOU 'nauseatingly patronising' and I hope your heart breaks and you cry buckets and you trip and fall on a hot, steaming pile of dog poo. AND I hope both your eyes turn red, so you feel as unsexy as I do.


so THERE! *dusts hands off*

Now kiss my feet.

Naughty Schoolgirls

Let's talk about Porn, people.

Lets talk about the first time I watched porn.


I was 13 years old. Innocent, carefree..not a care in the world...hence 'carefree'.
Anyway.

So my best friend- lets call her 'Saggy'- and I were at the playground, when our older, more worldly wise friend- lets call her 'PM'- comes upto us and excitedly says "You guys HAVE to come and check out what I found in my brothers cupboard!!!"

So the little curious girls that we were, we went upto PM's house, along with Saggy's little brother and sister. PM said "Uh...I don't think the 2 kids should see this.."
So we went into PM's room and shut the door.
Little did we know, that our impressionable and innocent minds were about to be defiled and corrupted beyond our wildest, filthiest nightmares.
Oh the Horrors that we witnessed.

She pushes a tape in the video player and hits the play button.
We see a guy and a hypermammiferous girl, kissing. Ok...that's fine.. kissing we can handle..the fondling gets a little unnerving but we can handle that too..
Then PM says "No, no you guys need to see this bit.."

Thats when she fast forwards it...
Fast forward.
That little function that makes things go 5 times faster than it normally would.
.
.
.
Needless to say, by the time she wanted us to see the 'good' bit, Saggy was at the door, her hand on the doorknob- frozen.
I was halfway getting off the bed- frozen.
Both of us kept repeating "We can't watch this..we can't watch this.."
Both of us, traumatised beyond words at the fast-paced action we just witnessed.

Saggy's little bro starts knocking from outside "Taggy, Taggy can I come in?!"
Uh. No, sweety. You can't. Ever.
"Why nottttt?"
Uh..coz..uh....we're uh...playing a game.

We left PM's house that day, quiet and glassy-eyed. The images forever seared into our unprepared minds.


The next day, at school, Saggy and I spent the whole day damning carnal pleasures and vociferously proclaiming that we were going to remain virgins for the rest of our lives.

Stop. Breathe.

Just about an hour back, I was looking out my window..at nothing in particular, and I thought to myself "Ok, God. Come on..talk to me."
And I absent-mindedly switched on the radio.
A man crooned 'Love is the secret we've been looking for..'
And I smiled and thought "Thanks..I agree."

God always talks to us, we don't hear him because we choose not to listen.
But every now and then he has a way of getting your attention.

It feel like its been a while since I've fed my soul instead of my brain.

I feel like I'm in love but I dont know who with (or more specifically I KNOW I'm not in love with anyone, there isn't anyone to be in love with, really, but it feels like it). Will I even recognize it when it does eventually come along?
Did that make any sense at all? Do my statements have any logic to them?
If they do, then please explain it to me.

I look out my window at this very moment and everything seems like its been frozen. Frozen in perfection. And yet everything has movement, has fluidity..everything fits.
Everything.
The trees are green and gold. Every leaf is a different colour but all form an incredible whole.
A lone window reflects the sunlight straight at me.
A pair of swallows execute the same acrobatic aerodynamic stunt, with amazingly graceful, natural panache. They make it look as easy as breathing.
The clouds look like wisps of cotton candy.
And my silly dog barks at a shirt flapping in the breeze.

There is equilibrium. And I revel in it, for however short a time it lasts.
There is no dissonance.

See what I mean when I say '..everything fits'?

And in Today's News!

Here's an article that I came across in The Straits Times today-

Brazil leader watched pirated film

Brazilian President Luiz Inacio Lul da Silva watched a pirated copy of a popular film during a recent flight, the government has confirmed.

His advisors had been responsible for obtaining an illegal copy of the Oscar-nominated film '2 Sons of Francisco', the BBC, quoting Brazilian media reports, reported yesterday.

It said the President was "saddened" by the revelation and that the advisors resposible had been reprimanded.

Mr Lula saw the film during a trip to Moscow in October- well before legal copies hit the market. '2 Sons of Francisco', by director Breno Silviera, tells the true story of Brazilian country music
singers Zeze and Luciano di Carmago- with whom Mr Lula is said to be friends.

Oh lawdy!

That was hilarious. *wipes away a tear*

Ok, ladies, lets get serious.

Reading this article set off a few questions/thoughts. And we all know how thought-provoking my thoughts are, now dont we?

1) The Prez (can I call him 'Prez'? Thanks.) has one mouthful of a name. Thank God they shortened it to 'Mr Lula'.

2) Who the hell cares if a movie is pirated? Certainly not me! Ok, ok sorry Mr Superstar-ActionHero. I'm sooo sorry you can't buy yourself ANOTHER gazillion square feet of space. Also, I don't let something as trivial as bad cinema print and lousy audio interrupt my viewing pleasure. And neither should you.

3) Which bored saddo actually goes and snitches about the Prez watching a pirated film!? I hope it was worth his time! So. not. cool.

4) The Prez was "saddened". Boo-frikkedy-hoo. He probably called a press conference, said he was "saddened" and then whispered to his No.2 "We're still on for 'Deuce Bigalow European Gigolo' tonight, yea?"

5) Why is the BBC bothering to waste valuable air time on someone watching a pirated movie? Don't they have other catastrophes/ terribly pressing issues to look into?

6) Ditto for The Straits Times.

I swear..I chuckled for a good 5 minutes after reading that.

And these Thoughts enter my Head.

• Lets say the girl using the cubicle before me, shat, and flushed...with her unwashed hands....let that sink in....*compulsively scrubs hands and vows to never use a public toilet again*
• I have found 3 remote controls in my room..and no corresponding appliance. What are they doing in my room? What is their purpose? Oh, so many questions..
• I need a sugar daddy.
• Judging a man by the shoes he wears is stupid. Judge a man by the condition of his bathroom and kitchen..thats so much more insightful.
• Been contemplating how to incorporate "Welcome to the O.C, bitch." into my daily conversations.
• Its my brothers birthday today, but are we partying? Nooo. Coz the pig pigged out during Diwali so much that he has an upset stomach. No treat for him which means no treat for me. *glares at pig*
• Ahhhh the joys of flirting. Not dirty flirting mind you. Yes, there IS clean flirting. You cheap, dirty people.
• I once saw a man enter the bus, and he had pus oooozing from his leg..overall incredibly gross. He was also a bit crazy. When I'm on that bus I'm paralysed by the fear that I've touched something that he has laid his being on. Does that make me evil? Or just anal retentive? Well, either way, pus is gross. And it's about time you realised that.
• I realised that I'm pretty much the same person, when I'm drunk AND when I'm sober. I'm just louder when I'm drunk. And whinier.
• I think a kiss should be stolen, and not asked for. Um unless the girl really doesn't like you. Thats when a stolen kiss turns into molestation. And that never ends well. Trust me.
• I crack up when I ask guys "So, what's up at your end?" I know, I know, I'm such a juvenile!!!!!!!!!!!!
• How annoying can running out toilet paper get???!?!
• I wish I was Oprah. Oh no wait, what I meant was, I wish I had Oprah's money and walk-in closet. Yep that's what I meant.
• I come up with some really good one-liners during the day, and much to my annoyance, I forget them by the time I want to use them on someone.
• I'm happy I left Lagos when I did. I doubt I'd have been this colourful if I hadn't.
• I think I'm the sort who wouldn't think twice about hitting/asking out a guy I really liked..oh wait...done that!
• When I'm nervous, I blab, turn red and then keep quiet and fidget.
• One of my many pet peeves- Realising there's no more shampoo left. Wtf mate?! That's almost as annoying as the toilet paper running out.
• I couldn't stop laughing about how I bugged the guy sitting next to me on my flight to Melbourne. I made him play hangman with me. He was a 30 year old Scotsman, who worked in an oil firm. And he played Hangman with Mahima from Singapore. He flirted with the stewardess and got Mahima a couple of Mars bars and a drink too. Ah bless his Scotty heart.
• Ok that's it for now. This is what studying for Social Psychology does to you.

Conversation with Mahi...and brownie points

(Names have been changed to protect identities..and I'm praying my friends won't kill me for putting this stuff up.)



Bobo: Hey fatty.
Me: Ah WHAT.
Bobo: Are todays plans on?
Me: Yes asshole.
Bobo: Awriiite man, it's ON!
Me: Yea it's on. Like your Dad on cake.

Brownie Points

Bobo: -15 (for calling me fat)

Me: 25 (for dissing his dad)

Angel: Mahi...

Me: Hey babes!

Angel: What would you do if you found that you roomie kept her socks under your pillow?

Me: Ewwwww! Were they used??

Angel: I don't know!

Me: Smell em!

Angel: Mahi..WHY would anyone put socks under my pillow, in the first place!?

Me: No idea!!! I think she secretly hates you hahaha

Brownie Points

Angel: 50 (pity points..no one deserves socks under her pillow)

Me: 0 ( felt bad for laughing..but it was funny)

RedSilkBoxers: I'm turtling..I need to take a dump.

Me: Turtling? Wazzat?

RedSilkBoxers: What does a turtle do after its woken up from its sleep?

Me: Ohhh! Turtling a.k.a Peek-a-boo shit?

RedSIlkBoxers: Good girl! Gee Mahi you're so full of shit =D

Me: Ah well what can I say? Shit happens! =D

Brownie Points

RedSilkBoxers: 20 (for introducing me to the term 'turtling' and for witty 'shit' puns)

Me: 20 (for knowing synonym of 'turtling' and for witty 'shit' puns)

Gogo: Howww, how do I get her?

Me: Are you interested in friendship?

Gogo: Not really..

Me: Do you want to get into her pants?

Gogo: Hm...I think so!

Me: Look, become her friend, gain her trust, then attack..heh heh eeehhh-xcellent.

Brownie Points

Gogo: 2 (for being honest, but still being a boob)

Me: 0 (-5 for teaching someone how to be a scumbag and +5 for doing an excellent 'Mr Burn's' impression.)

Me: Dad, how come you fell for mom? I mean, you two are so different..

Dad: I saw her legs..shit, I was floored. They were amazing. They ARE amazing (yea, nice save, soldier)

Brownie Points

Dad: 100 (for being such a cheeky boy!)

Me: N.A (I was too busy laughing to count.)

Grimm: Yes, those wedding plans can be a hassle

Me: Yea, flower arrangements, guest list-people from your side, people from my side..

Grimm: Of course, Kelso will be there =)

Me: =D Oh Kelso definitely WILL be there at the wedding.

Brownie Points

Grimm: 500 gazillion ( for knowing Kelso will be there)

Me: 20 (for meeting someone as delightful as him haha)

Drunk Monkey: I need to peee

Drunk Me: Why didn't you just pee when we were upstairs?!!?

Drunk Monkey: I don't tell it when to pee! You tell it when to pee!!

Drunk Me: Honey, I ain't telling it anything, anytime soon.

Brownie Points

Monkey: 30 (for being a monkey and making me laugh like hell that day)

Me: -17 (for telling the poor boy off, when he wanted to pee.)

KPog: Mahi..Just wanted to say when Peepu comes back, we'll all meet up..I know we all haven't been able to meet often enough..

Me: Aww, why do u say that man..

KPog: Well..I'm off to someones party by myself..you said bloggings become an integral part of your life..haha...we've all pretty much gone off on different tracks..But when the semesters done, things will go back to normal..I promise.

Me: Thanks =) Definitely appreciate the thought man..

Brownie Points

KPog: 260, 055 (for being a sweetheart)

Me: - (All brownie points go to KPog for being a sweetheart.)

Completely Pissed Drunk Me: C'meeeere, let me hug youuu!!!I LOVE YOUUUUUUUUUU I REALLY REALLY DO!*tiiiiiiight hug*

Friends: We love you too Mahi hahaha *hug*

Brownie Points

Friends: 20 billion zillion trillion (for being amazing)

Me: 73 ( for being hilarious when I'm drunk)

**UPDATE: I am SO fucking PISSED OFF!!

I just took kelso down for a walk right, and the estate guard cycles up to me and says "Sorry ah, but someone just complained about your dog abt how he's unleashed and how u don't clean up after him.."
I'm like "What rubbish! Firstly, Kelso is tiny, the law states he DOESN'T have to be leashed up if he's not fierce, which you know he isn't and secondly, I ALWAYS clean up after my dog."
The guard just smiled sheepishly and said "Sorry..."
Sorry my ARSE.
I'm NOT gonna leash him up. I WILL continue to clean up after him.
And I hope that the fucker who complained, steps on so much fucking dog shit, that the stink stays for months to come.
Asshole.

The Winds of Change are Here.

Something's up.

I can feel it.

And it's making me twitchy.

Any minute now, any minute now.

Seriously people, can't you feel something stirring in the otherwise- still air?

Or is it just me?

Well, we'll wait and watch.

But before I go on, I should let you all in on something:

I've dreamt of another tsunami coming. Don't laugh, don't scoff (or if you must..hell go ahead, I can't stop you) The last time I dreamt of waves and falling buildings, the Dec 26th Tsunami occured a few days later.

This amongst other things.

I'm standing near a jetty with my friend and her family. The sky suddenly gets very dark. It's incredibly windy. And then, there in the middle of the sea, begins a whirlpool. A dark, evil, monster of a whirlpool.

Next thing I know I'm looking over Mom's shoulder as she stands on that very same jetty and peers into the now-murky water. She's desperately looking for my passport amongst the floating debris. She takes one out of the water.

"No mom, that's not mine..That's Mink's.."

She can't hear me, but flips it open, reads the name, and keeps it with her anyway.

I look down at my hands and they have no clear definition..like a picture that is fading before my very eyes.

I can feel only rising panic.

I know a whirlpool isn't a tsunami, but what's important is that in my dream, it is one.

What I'm trying to say is, be careful and stay alert.

Well..that's it.

Just thought I should share.

Take care

Ok?

Of Men and Idiots.

Your Seduction Style: Au Natural

You rank up there with your seduction skills, though you might not know it. That's because you're a natural at seduction. You don't realize your power! The root of your natural seduction power: your innocence and optimism. You're the type of person who happily plays around and creates a unique little world. Little do you know that your personal paradise is so appealing that it sucks people in. You find joy in everything - so is it any surprise that people find joy in you? You bring back the inner child in everyone you meet with your sincere and spontaneous ways. Your childlike (but not childish) behavior also inspires others to care for you. As a result, those who you befriend and date tend to be incredibly loyal to you.

What Kind of Seducer Are You?

Oooh.

So THAT'S what I am eh?

Now I'm not neccessarily saying that all of that's true. All I'm saying is that I'm hot.

Yes siree.

Ok seriously.

What irks me about the opposite sex, are three things :

1) Ingratiating men.

They annoy me. They don't charm me. Being ingratiating makes me want to stick my finger in my mouth and vomit. That, or murder you. Painfully. Slowly. And I'll enjoy it. In fact, I'll even laugh as I slowly murder you. I'll say "THAT'S for trying to be smarmy. THAT'S for flattering me till I want to end my very existence and THAT'S for using lines like : You're so sweet, I'll get diabetes!

I can smell an ingratiater a mile away.

Don't gaze at me adoringly and don't worship the ground I walk on.

Not unless you know me really well. And if you STILL adore me, DESPITE knowing what I'm like, then you're amazing and chances are, I'll love you to bits for having THAT much patience.

Look I'm full of myself. Flattery will get you everywhere with me.

But do it RIGHT.

Do it right, and I'll be like putty in your hands and I'll allow myself to get suckered in.

Do it wrong, and you force me to write blogs like this one.

2) Men assuming I have no flaws.

Look I SWEAR I'm not on an ego trip. I'm being dead honest.

Some men are either blind, in pure denial or seeng what they want to see.

All of which are equally and extremely sad.

I have faults. I like it when people are honest and tell me "Mahi, you're an idiot." (But er..don't say that too often) or "Mahi, you're a screw-up."

Why do I like it? Coz then I don't have to live up to any hype. There's no pressure and no responsibility to be bloody amazing all the time.

'Know what I mean?

I'm not trying to act cute when I whine about how I wanna have coffee near my place. I'm being selfish. I'm being Lazy. I don't want to travel. If I REALLY do like you, I'll go wherever you want me to go. Take it from there.

Don't smile indulgently! Don't cajole me like I'm a little kid. Don't try and buy me out by offering to pay. That won't help coz honey, you'll have to buy me a whole lot more than a simple coffee it'll make me want to say 'No' just to piss you off.

GETIT?!

Now, now all you nosey, lovely people- this isn't about anyone in particular ;) This is completely random.

Now for your viewing pleasure..ANOTHER stupid friendster message (Thanks Hanita!). You're all gonna love this.

Original message from Heartbeat:

> * Plucks Up Some Courage *

>* Tempt u with Chocolate *

> * Tempt u with Roses *

> My name is Shekh, 25 years of age. Finished my

> degree in Business Admin. I am now working in a

> shipping firm as a Marketing Executive.

> 8 am to 8 pm i am the hard working guy, wearing

> smart pants, shirts and ties. 8 pm to 8 am i am

> the guy, wearing jeans, tee shirts etc. (He has clothes. That's nice.) Have lots of

> friends. I respect all my friends. Friendship is love.

> Love is friendship. I am not really that nice a guy. (Oh? Sudden change of heart?) I

> have some bad characters in me. Well, of cos,

> time will change that. I drink, i smoke, i club. (This is where he turns into the 'bad boy'. Oo Turn On.) Well

> all this could be due to depression. I dont know.

> Must be. Guess i miss de girl i love. Though she is

> someone elses. Hmm....I love playing pool,

> soccer, blue roses, getting wet in the rain, walking

> along the beach, admiring the full moon, playing

> with babies, social service at times, (aaand this is where he turns into the sensitive new age guy) and i love my

> work alot. Well, spend most of my day in the

> office.

> Ok Girl, get up, u fell asleep? Get Up. Dont make

> me feel sad ok? That's me, Shekh.... (O-kay Sad Shekh.)

> ERm....

> Can i store ur number in my fone book?" (No, Shekh) "Can i

> sms you?"(No Shekh you can't) "Puleezee....Dont say no...Are you

> nodding ur head in acceptance? (No, Shekh, I'm not.)

> Ok Listen, i want to get to know you better. You

> might suggest, messaging here or even Msn, but u

> know, if you trust me, we can get to noe each

> other thru sms. Then again, shall not force you. If

> you feel comfortable, i'll sms you. Fill in the

> application form below.

> Handphone Number Given: Yes / No

> Handphone Number : _____________

> Reason Not Given : ________________________

> Advice For Re Application : ___________________

(Uhh...)

> By the way, You Look Nice :) Obviously, isn't that

> why i am trying to get to noe u? Hmm...Honesty is

> de best policy. (No honey. Not in your case. If it were upto me, I'd lock you up in the basement.)

> Please take note...if u reject...i might have to stalk

> u....And...Stalking...is worse then giving your

> number...hehe...So Please Help me from stalking

> you... :)

Sweet mother of Jesus.

He sent in an application form.

Okay, Clairebell. If you listen verrry carefully, you'll realise that's the sound of people laughing.

At you.

Because you're a bonafide IDIOT.

Here's number 3

3) DON'T BE A FREAKSHOW.