Mahi does Kolkata

The 4th of June marked my first (of many, I'm sure) trip to my future-maybe-home of Kolkata.

Wait, what?!
Reeewind...........

So my dear Avi is currently based in Kolkata and so it would seem that in Kolkata, is where my future lies!
I'll be honest, the thought of moving of India kinda scares the living daylights out of me, but when I stop to think about it - hasn't my whole life been about moving and adapting? And so the Mahi shall move, adapt and bring her own brand of crazy to Kolkata (or wherever else I end up).
:)

This trip was the first of many, many things:

1) My first time taking a certain flight carier to India, all alone.
And what a maiden voyage it was. So I boarded the rickety little flight to Kolkata. The word 'rickety' should pretty much clue you in on the state of the plane. I won't mention the flight carrier but I reeeally wish I could just so that none of you guys have to suffer like I did. The food was awful. It's never a good sign when you can't quite identify what you're eating - "Is the sandwich filled with cheese? Egg-white? Mayonnaise? Foam? Puffy white clouds from hell?
Here's the kicker - the toilets were unisex. (Oh.My.God.)* I know this comes off as awfully racist but come on, we all know the state of the loos on flights packed with Indians.
And of course I always end up in the seat either in a row of crying babies or in this case - diagonally behind a very concerned perv who kept turning around to check if my chest was still where it should be.
*Okay, so it's been brought to my attention that ALL flights have unisex toilets. I really am living on my own planet. Sorry, crappy flight carrier. This still doesn't take away from the fact that your overall service, seats and food sucks!!
After that, I thought hey...things can't get worse, I've landed safe and sound, yay! So, imagine my surprise when I realised the airport didn't have trolleys...yep, no trolleys. So I'm there,  with all my baggage, but nothing to put it on! I struggled, BROKE A NAIL, listened with silent, mean, joy as a disgruntled 70 year old woman ripped the airport officials a new one, as she ranted about the lack of trolleys. Thankfully, I soon rested my eyes upon Avi waiting for me. An oasis in the desert and what relief, bliss, happiness, joy, love and peace, I experienced! All was fine once again :)

2) My first time tasting the food in Kolkata
Wow. Wow. Wow. Good stuff and great service but damn, these guys really like their chilli don't they? Drinking copious amounts to douse the fire on my tongue and in my belly aside, the food was delish and the desserts were delish-er! Also, I don't think I've ever had so much tea in my life, people here are very passionate about their food and drink. I think I'll fit right in ;)

3) My first time visiting the Kalighat temple
Located in a bit of a dodgy area, this temple was quite an eye-opener! While it felt incredibly powerful, it was  so unlike any other temple I had been to - animal sacrifices, women in trances, dogs and rats running around....I'm not sure I'd visit it again but I'm glad I saw it this time around.

4) My first time shopping in Kolkata
So I realised I'm really not much of a shopper. Show me 5 outfits and tell me to pick one - no problem. But start bringing in outfit after outfit after outfit...and it messes my head up! I'm likely to pick one just to end the process. When I finally do my wedding shopping, I'm taking Mom with me - let her pick and make me choose. Freedom of will (in this case) is so overrated.
Some of the shopkeepers were a little too pushy for my liking - one lady shoved a punjabi suit into my hands and instructed about 5 times "You take this."
"Ummm, no thank you?"
On the upside - I made the shopkeepers happy because they finally had a customer tall enough to wear the outfits. It's like outfits were made for me! I felt so special and princessy trying on the first 8-10 outfits...after that, I just got downright tired.

5) My first visit to the apartment we'll be living in
I visited the beautiful cosy apartment we'll be living in. I could hardly believe I was in the house in which I'd probably be raising my kids in. How time flies and how grown-up I felt!
I also managed to offload a quarter of my luggage in the apartment. Consisting mostly of home accessories and a few clothes - it was my little way of Mahi-fying the house!

6) My first time having a cockroach crawl up leg
I don't come across roaches in Singapore often and getting upclose and personal with one was NOT an experience I relished, I can tell ya that. One particularly adventurous roach decided to climb Mount Mahi while I was taking a shower. The silent shock, horror and repulsion I experienced was mindblowing and almost like a bit of a spiritual experience.
*Shuddddddder*

So Kolkatta wasn't a bed of roses but I feel lucky because when I do move there, I'll have Avi by my side and some very lovely people as friends! I'd like to think I'll not only make the most of my stay there, but even enjoy it quite a bit :) (fingers crossed!)

Raising the Bar..Naaat!

Since my darling Arpeeta upped and left Singapore after she got married, my clubbing/pubbing nights haven't come to a screeching halt but they have reduced quite a bit. Still, I'm pleased to announce that the level of craziness hasn't. Behold:

Free drinks and an e-mail address
Hans and I arrive at a popular loungey-clubby place, to celebrate my getting a job. Turns out she knows the bartender and he in turn seems pleased to see us (....who wouldn't be, right? :P).

Bartender: Tell you what, for every drink you guys buy, I'll give you two - on the house!
Me: Oh no, no, that's very nice of you but I was only going to have a couple of drinks and then make a move...
About 8 drinks later....
Me: Haaaaans! This drink has strawberries in it! ACTUAL STRAWBERRIES!!!

Another 5 drinks later we start chatting with a Brazilian lady, and of all things, about politics.
Brazilian woman: That Dick Cheney, I tell you...
Me: Yeah! Dick Cheney SUCKS! (skulls her drink)
Hans: And that Sarah Palin!
Me: Sarah Palin SUCKS!! (skulls the other one)

The night ends with us somehow landing up at another club with 2 Germans in tow, downing mojitos and I wake up the next morning to find
1) a mysterious email address entered in my phone book..??!
(Once the alcoholic fog cleared up I realised it was the Brazilian woman's email address. I was still single at that time and it annoys me that of all things, I collected an EMAIL ADDRESS and that too -  a woman's email address?! Sheesh. Pick-up FAIL, Mahi.)
2) some weird name in the phone book but with no number...guess I must have not been that into the guy!
3) myself wondering how bad my hangover was going to be (I found out through the course of the day that it was, in fact, TERRIBLE)

YMCA Dancing
Avi and I joined a couple of our friends at a popular club in Bombay. Imagine my sheer and immense joy when they started playing the YMCA song and ALL the waiters and bartenders jumped on the tables and bar and started dancing - in sync!
Also it was one of the few times I've seen Avi get tipsy and to answer your urgent question - yes, Avi turns into a very smiley drunk :) Also...I can do the YMCA pretty well after 3 drinks.

A bottle of wine
This is just awesome. Not my story but my friend X's, who was recounting this to us at lunch. She was at the afore mentioned popular loungey-clubby place when she met a guy at the bar. He asked if she wanted to have some wine. X agreed to a glass but the guy ordered a whole bottle.
After having some, X announced that she needed to visit the ladies and that she'd be back. Oh, also please note that X was pretty tipsy even before she met the guy at the bar.
So, clutching the walls of the room, X slowly made her way to the loo, did her thing, walked out of the club, hopped into a cab and drove off....all the while thinking "What am I forgetting upstairs?"

Uh....


Ahhh I love the crazy! :D

How I Met Your Dad*

* My future kids' Dad, not like, YOUR Dad...Also, yes, I like watching 'How I Met Your Mother'.

So here's the story of how I met my Husband-to-be. Sit back, relax, grab a drink and enjoy. Or if you're at work, then be sure to make this window reeeeally tiny.

So the year was 2009 and I was headed to India for my cousin's wedding. There I was - slightly jaded and not really in the mood to find love.

After all, I had spent years wondering if there was an equation to this love business (only to realise there wasn't really), going through crappy Valentine's Days, and I had my childhood hopes dashed to the ground when I turned 23. Oh, and let's not forget going through many a soul-crushing arranged-marriage introduction. *Shudder*

So I wasn't really in the mood to find love, but little did I know that perhaps love was in the mood to find me! Heh heh.

So my family and I arrived in India and headed to my Cousin R's place. Cousin R - a fine, upstanding young man, was getting married to D - a super-smart, petite doll. As soon as we entered the house, all of Dad's sister's and my cousins, started discussing marriage. Of course I started inwardly (and outwardly) groaning because I knew this would inevitably end up with my mom and I arguing about HER choice in men when it comes to arranged marriages.

So me being me, I turned to R:
"So..any cute men at this wedding?"
R thinks and goes 'Well Mahi, I don't know about cute but there IS this really super-nice guy..."
"How tall?"
"About your height, maybe taller..."
"I see, and how cute?"
"Mahi, sraight men don't think about other men being cute..."
"Bah."

My innocent query started a ruckus and within 15 minutes the entire family started teasing me about this allegedly super-nice guy.

I thought everyone had gone insane and my mood was quickly heading from 'Annoyed' to 'You-people-are-ridiculous-leave-me-alone'. It got even worse when my Mom and aunts forbade me from wearing my 3 inch heels because well..I end up looking quite Amazonian in them. It's safe to say that I was in a pretty rotten mood that night.

The next night was the first event - the cocktail night. I'm hanging out (in my FLATS) with my brother and Cousin K when I see Cousin R beckoning me. R is standing with his fiancee D, and a little distance from them are a boy and girl - both friends of D, who met them when she was doing her Masters in the US.

So R grins excitedy pulls me towards them and I casually notice the boy is about my height. Suddenly I can see R's diabolical plan has been put into action but it's too late!

"Oh...NO..nononono.........".

R calls out to the boy "Hi! Avi, this is Mahima, Mahima meet Avi!!" and he just stands there, grinning, looking back and forth. The poor girl that Avi was with is completely ignored. Avi turns around and the first thing I think to myself is "Wow my mom would love this guy. He virtually wears a halo...or maybe it's just the lighting". The second thing I think to myself is "Stop staring and act cool, Mahima!"

Of course in those few microseconds I've taken in the guy's stats with my powers of super-observation - 5'10, curly hair, light brown eyes, nice even teeth, neat hands, well-pressed suit. Not too shabby!

I recover from my mortification and hold out my hand to shake his (nice clean hands as well...zing!), and I do the same to the girl - A. We smile and make small talk. This continues throughout the evening and I'm struck by what a genuinely nice fellow this Avi person is. Plus I'm all about getting vibes so I got good vibes from this one. I don't mean ANY of this in a lusty way, I swear!

I later see my Dad talking to this guy, for a good half an hour and I wonder for a few seconds if I should go in and save him (Avi, not Dad) but then I think "Naaah." After the conversation Dad comes up to me and asks excitedly "So where is this guy that everyone was talking about last night?" and I morosely say "You just spent the last half an hour talking to him.."
"Oh! Neat looking guy. His suit was very well pressed, I was quite impressed!"
"Et tu, Dad?"

An hour or so into the evening, Avi, A and I are talking when R comes upto Avi, grins and goes "Avi, this is my cousin Mahima, Mahima, this is Avi."
I'm thinking "Yes, that's been established since we've been standing here and talking to each other since the past 10 minutes" but instead I'm once again mortified and I go "Oh very subtle, R. Thanks." and to my utter horror I see Avi giving him a small grin and I'm thinking "Oh my God, he's in on this!?! Halo, my foot!!"

(Of course I later found out that Avi wasn't in on R's plan and thought R was drunk when he made the second inroduction.)

So we chit chat throughout the evening and meet again the next day at the wedding and the evening reception. I was quite amazed by him because he seemed like such a good-hearted person. We got along great and it felt like a relief to meet someone who wasn't putting on a show to impress and to be honest - it felt great to not have to put on a show either.

At the end of the recepion, all of us were saying goodbye to one another and I gave him a hug and said "Keep in touch". He smiled and said he would but I knew chances were he probably wouldn't (coz, hey..they never do, right?) but I couldn't quite explain the immense sadness I felt at having to say goodbye to him and worse still - the thought of never meeting him again.

I left India, happy that I had made some new friends. My Mom left India annoyed that she hadn't met any potential son-in-laws - but she needn't have worried about that.

It turns out that Avi did keep in touch with me when I got back... and every day after that.  When I thought about how I'd have loved to have Avi as a friend, I didn't realise that maybe that's the exact same plan the Big Guy up there had :)

Before either of us knew it, he proposed and I accepted. My parents love him, my bro thinks he's a good guy, my friends adore him (mostly he coz he bribed them by buying them gifts when he visited Singapore) and most importantly - Kelso loves him.

We'll be getting married at the end of the year and I don't quite know how to end this post! A simple "Ta-daaa!" seems lacking and maybe rightfully so - after all this isn't the end :)

Now, if only I can come up with a good enough way to squirm out of no. 9 on this post.....