01 September, 2006

School Stories- Part 1- Bollywood Queen Roohi.

So the year was 2000, and everyone had gotten reshuffled into different classes for Secondary 3 (that's the 9th grade).
So on the first day of school, I walked into class, straightened my *Ahem* Prefect's tie and took in some new and some old faces, some faces I couldn't stand and some faces that I was thankful to see.

I saw Roohi.

Roohi was (is) about half my height (HAHA sorry babe you know I can't resist!!!), with flashing dark brown eyes framed with ultra long lashes that would always get smushed behind her glasses, high cheekbones, an amazing hourglass figure and lovely wavy-curly hair, a strand of which she would CONSTANTLY twirl with her finger. God. It was SO annoying.
Nevermind that 2 months later, you just had to look up from your book to see 39 girls absentmindedly twirling their hair too.
Not me though.
*small voice*My hair was too short for that.

She had a REALLY strong Indian accent, but with just a splash of that Singlish thrown in.
'Lavender' became 'Luh-vhen-der', 'Comfortable' became 'Comfort-table' and 'Love' became 'Luuuhve'.
Of course, me being me, I mercilessly teased her about it.
I know. I'm such a snob. (Oh we made fun about her Mom's ultra strong Punjabi accent too- in front of her.)

:D All love Roohi, all love!

Anyway she looked every bit the quintessential Bollywood starlet.

Okay, fair enough. I had seen her around..she was a friend of my best friend Sagarika. Nice enough girl.
We decided to sit together.

Now Mahi at the age of *counts* 16 was a bit of jerk. Quick to pounce on the easily emo-senti (that's emotional-sentimental), she found an easy, convenient target in Roohi. Sure she adored her, but hell..it was just so easy!

One afternoon in class, I was busy at work on my essay and from the corner I could see Roohi picking up her pen to write something, only to put it back down. She did this over and over again.
I ignored it.
The she started twisting her fingers in what seemed to be mind boggling urgency. She would look at me, open her mouth to speak, bite her lip and then turn away. She did this over and over again.

With a deep breath I finally put my pen down calmly, turned to her and said "What. What, Roohi, WHAT."
"Mahi...*twisting of fingers*...Where is this relationship going?!?!"
.
.
.
I just stared at her like she had gone nuts.
She worriedly blinked at me.

And then I felt The Laugh.
The Laugh that starts in your belly, causes your nostrils to flutter, gurgles up to your throat, struggles to get out but your pursing lips don't allow it too.
It finally erupted and I saw Roohi's 'hurt-look' (again).

Oh it turns out that Roohi simply thought I was being too cold and unfeeling towards her..or something cockamamey story like that.

She got hurt of course, started tearing up- which I laughed even harder at.
Then her eyebrows would form Nike ticks and she'd blast me for laughing and then when I still wouldnt stop, she'd wring her hands and scream "What is your problem?!!"


My daily routine at school would be to find some way or another to piss her off.
She was (is) positively anal about keeping her books scratch-free, dog eared-free, mark-free, everything-free.
So naturally, I just had to take her Bio textbook, or any book of hers within my vicinity, and say slowly "Oh Rooooooohiii" and in front of her horrified eyes, I would slowly start folding a page in half.
"Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo"
Of course this, like other fights, would end with Roohi tearing up, fluttering her hands in front of her teary eyes and me apologizing and trying in vain to straighten the page out. "See??See Roohi, it's straight! Uhh..Just ignore that little mark on the page..it's almost INVISIBLE!"

We'd fight like cats and dogs everyday- I admit, I almost always started it coz I loved antagonizing her.
Sidra (coming up soon) who used to sit behind us would wearily roll her eyes and scream "Can you guys stop being COMPLETE IDIOTS FOR ONE DAY?" .
Roohi and I would stop, look behind at her, say in unison "But she started it!!", turn back in front and carry on fighting/screaming/pulling hair/vandalising each other's stuff.
Sidra would tiredly get up, pack her books and go to the back to sit with Arpeeta and Ju (coming up too).

At every break, we'd assign Duties (Arpu was in charge of this). Roohi used to be in charge of getting the garlic bread but she'd take ages.Finally she exploded in exasperation one day and angrily stated that she absolutely WOULD NOT get the garlic bread for us anymore.
Why?
"Coz I'M TOO SHORT AND EVERYONE PUSHES ME ASIDE AND MANAGES TO GET THEIR ORDER IN BEFORE ME!!'


That was Roohi- A child at heart, emotional, loving, easily angered but easily placated, a neat freak, conscious about her height (it's part of the charm baby!) and the butt of my jokes.

Ahhh thank God somethings never change :D

Roohi is one of my dearest friends. We've been through so much and I know I don't say this emo-senti shit enough but- I love you Roohi! You've been there for me so many times that I've lost count. I still have those silly notes we would write to each other in class and I still remember how a teacher once told you she loved reading your curlicue handwriting..as yes as much as I snorted about how annoying it was to read, I loved it too.


Now stop complaining about how I never blog about you because I don't care about you!!!
See! I care!

-Mahi cackles and walks away, folding Roohi's papers in half-
Heh heh heh.

Update : I just called Roohi to tell her to check this blog.
Roohi - Did you write about me??
Me- Maybe..maybe not
Roohi - You slut, you'd better have written about me. You never ever write about me!!!!!
Me- hahahaahahaha

Labels: ,

17 Comments:

Anonymous arpeeta did the happy dance and finally said..

LOl...MAHI.. im laughing so much reading ure blog!
Those were such such good times..and i know this is extra..but i love u guys too...u roohi minku sid and ju are the bestest friends ever!..love u guys!

9:51 PM  
Blogger Raindrop did the happy dance and finally said..

You evil thing! Stop making fun of short people! Stop it! :(

10:19 PM  
Blogger Grafxgurl did the happy dance and finally said..

poor roohi!!

well...lol.. im just 5ft2 and "A" is 6ft 2....so ...u get a LOT of teasing....sigh.. i feel for you Roohi!:D

10:32 PM  
Blogger KittyPunkiexxx did the happy dance and finally said..

hey... ummm... love your blog. it's really nifty

11:26 PM  
Blogger exclusively_me did the happy dance and finally said..

school days are such fun ....there's sumthin abt school n frends frm school that make those days appear so magical....

11:28 PM  
Blogger Madame Mahima did the happy dance and finally said..

arpu - u wont believe it i was just giggling remembering the stuff we used to do...love u guys loads too :) good times good times!
ill have so many stories to tell the kids haha

raindrop - awwwww...but but i cant help it!! u short uns made me feel like such a freakshow when i was a teen :( its payback baby *evil grin*

grafx - :O a whole foot taller!!! lol yea..roohi got teased alot..by me :D

thanks kitty!

xclusivley me - exactly :) in writing this blog i mustve relived about 10 other memories associated with this girl :D

11:51 PM  
Anonymous roohi did the happy dance and finally said..

MAHI..u are sooo dead!!!hahahaa..actually im not mad..haahh.i find it really funny!btw pple..mahi loves to add spice to the actual stories..soo all the tearing and all didnt happen!!!!!but i must admit..i am very anal about by books and paper..so if any of u fold any pages..thats it!hehe..thanks for blogging on me!love u too!its too late to call u and scold u..so be ready for tom morning!

12:26 AM  
Anonymous minku did the happy dance and finally said..

MuahahHaa...ya blOg is so hilarious,..i rem how roohi cldnt stop twiRlin her hair even till Jc,..love u guyssss tooo...
Muakhss

6:15 PM  
Blogger abhi did the happy dance and finally said..

o ai likea da part ven roohi call u da slut o

4:25 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous did the happy dance and finally said..

hey mahi,
i havent actually read through the whole thing (bite me!!)..but just to say hey..and arpu whats up? sorry could not reply back to your mail (actually if i had thought straight should have mailed you instead of leaving this comment) well anyways keep in touch..miss you guys.. Jr.

9:49 PM  
Blogger Madame Mahima did the happy dance and finally said..

roohi - :O haw! rude! i never EVER EVER EVER add SPICE to my STORIES! :o oh camaan our whole class knew u used to cry at the drop of a hat!

minku - my goddd that twirling thing used to drive me NUTS. id feel like physically tying her hands to her chair or something!

thanks man abhi. your haircut SUCKS ASS BTW. :P

j - bite you!? you WISH man!
*pffft*
how are you feeling? we miss u too J!
(psst...dont worry i didnt expect you to read the whole thing..we know youre not a words person :P) heh heh

11:12 PM  
Blogger Harjee Kapur did the happy dance and finally said..

poor roohi... if i was her i would have whacked you.
after all, like friends know how to take a joke, others should also know how to take a good whacking...

but sorry roohi, i still couldn't stop laughing.... mahi writes well. and yes, i agree hefty discounts are in order for her narrative :)
now inshallah she needs to taste payback.... any ideas? anyone?

12:27 PM  
Blogger abhi did the happy dance and finally said..

never thot my hair could do that .... we have a winner here ...

harjee: plans are already on ... close heels on deployment

1:06 AM  
Blogger Miz BoheMia did the happy dance and finally said..

Ha, ha, ha, ha, haaaaaa! Indeed!

Roohi, I do love me this Ladee Mahi but you sound fab and being an OCDish bohemian I understand all about the book thing so Mahi, lay off sweet Roohi!

I loved this piece Ladee! Charming FO SHO!!!

7:03 PM  
Blogger Twisted DNA did the happy dance and finally said..

"btw pple..mahi loves to add spice to the actual stories.."
haha. I am glad that there somebody there not to verify these stories ;)

10:19 AM  
Blogger Madame Mahima did the happy dance and finally said..

harjee - been there done that (regarding the whacking! i have soo many bruises :( ) sigh..payback has become part of my daily life mate..with friends like these who needs enemies :P

abhi - oh you :@

miz b - but its sooo much fun bullying her..lemme have my fun pretty pleeeease :D
thanks yummy mummy!

twisted dna - oh pfft...dont mind them...every word in this blog is the whole truth, the only truth and everything but the truth :P

11:46 AM  
Anonymous Jups did the happy dance and finally said..

Dear Ms.Meany Mcbitchy, STOP MAKING FUN OF SHORT PEOPLE..

sorry, i get senti abt vertically challenged people..sigh..

teehee.. i used to be terribly mean in school too ;)

6:09 PM  

Post a Comment

<< Home

Blogroll Me!
Google