02 June, 2006

Miss Mahi Goes to Work (with KIDS.)

The Week is OVER and Mahi is all pooped OUT (um..not that kinda pooped)

Let's start from the start, shall we?

Since I was having holidays, I decided to take up a job offer which required me to be a facilitator of sorts, at this workshop. Think 'camp' sorta facilitator but without the huts, bunkbeds, bed bugs, stayovers, toasted marshmallows-by-the-fire and early wake-up calls no wait...those early wake-up calls were there.
Okay so it wasn't like a stay over sorta camp but it was quite literally the whole day- think 7-something till 5 something.

I must admit I was apprehensive about it at first coz well...it involved kids..LOTS of them...
And we all know how I feel about kids.
(I re-iterate, I do not hate 'em, some just annoy me...greatly)

So let's see..I had to wake up at the ungodly hour of 6.00 a.m and thought to myself 'Dude. You are so not made for this early morning business.'
Shuffled around sleepily, had a shower, changed and left.

I decided to be all miserly and take the bus.

This is for all of you who think I am a brat and I have nothing better to do in life than to whine about how I want to be dropped everywhere (a.k.a ALL OF YOU.)

So Yea. I took the bus.
You know sometimes your seat has place for someone else, and when people enter the bus, you hope and pray that the stinky guy-who-looks-like-he-hasnt-taken-a-shower-and-has-taken-a-dump-in-his-shorts doesn't come and sit next to you?
............And yet he does?

Yea that's what happened to me.
And oh no, no, NO, Dear Reader, it doesn't end there.
Not only does stinky-man sit next to me, but he proceeds to dig his nose to glory.
Dig his nose till kingdom come.
Dig his nose like there's no bloody tomorrow.
Dig his nose like there's a hidden diamond somewhere in there and he'll be damned if he doesn't get it.

And after he's procured his hidden treasure, he turns and stares at me. Just stares. And so I pretend to be very fascinated by the road and I stared determinedly out the window.
In my experience it is wise to not stare back at stinky-shitty-men.

The ONE time I voluntarily take the bus, I get THIS GUY sitting next to me?

Thankfully the day went much better.
I worked 4 days in all with kids of all ages and sizes and shapes and smells.
During times like these, I thank the lord for my height. It is waaay more easier to intimidate kids when you're towering over them.

The younger ones are so much more easier and sweeter to work with.
I would get "Teacher Mahi, teacher Mahi that boy is not doing his work!" to which I would smile and say "Okay I'll talk to him, thank you for telling me darling. Now go do your work"
(And then they'd giggle about how I called that girl a 'Darling')

I would get "Teacher Mahi, teacher Mahi I am nervous about going on stage!" to which I would say "Darling! Dont be scared! Just go up and have fun!"
(And then the boy would go "Eeee she called me dahling!!!")

Or I would get "Teacher Mahi, teacher Mahi I need to poopoo." to which I would say "Uh...go talk to that *point* teacher."

Nah I'm kidding.
None of them needed to poop, THANK GOD.
(And if they did..well all I'm gonna say is Kelso's poop is the only poop I clean up.)

Of course there are always the bullies who think they're better than anyone.
The height difference REALLY helps with making you look like alpha female.

Some of them cracked me up when they gave hilarious answers like when asked "How would you get rid of mosquitoes?" One cutie answered "I will SLAP it!"
And how they couldn't pronounce 'incandescent' (icandesent?...incasedsent?...icadecent?)
and 'flourescent' (fourasent...foresant..foracant?)
and 'instantaneous' and 'climate' and 'appliance' (apleeance)

The job ended today, I thought I'd be ecstatic that I wouldn't have to wake up and face bratty kids but I'm actually a little.....sad? I mean you guys know how much kids annoy me sometimes right?
I don't know man.
I mean I gotta admit some of them were really cute with their little pigtails and bell-like voices and how they'd look at you like you were so amazing.

Nah..I'm a toughie.

I must be getting soft in my old age.

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Blogger Grafxgurl did the happy dance and finally said..

i used to think kids needed otbe banned...then allowed to reapper when they wer adults...now..i thnk theyre adorable....

they get to you...eventually.

you can run but you cant hide!

9:46 PM  
Blogger Medha.. did the happy dance and finally said..

Ummm... how come i don't see any mention of the cute 17 year old who kept staring at you every five minutes??? :p:p

Lol =)

10:15 PM  
Blogger Madame Mahima did the happy dance and finally said..

grafx - ack! i think its good for the survival of the human race that we end up finding them adorable!

medha - u stupid coww!!!! i dont tell u this stuff to have u repeat it on my blog!!!
time to stop telling medha stuff!

11:20 PM  
Blogger Medha.. did the happy dance and finally said..


Oye.. but .. its a funny story... you SHOULD tell everyone! :p


11:38 PM  
Anonymous mInKuuu did the happy dance and finally said..

mahiyuuuuuuuu i cant believe you are sad to quit! this means teachin is fer you! that is so AWESOME!!!!!!! oHmYgOD! we cld actuallie be tachers together some day! it will be soooooooo fun....
and yeah you GOTTO share abt that child who cldnt get his eyes off YOU! haha...
also was this as gd as the one day kindergarten experience???
let me know...

12:00 AM  
Blogger AYTIDA did the happy dance and finally said..

little kids are fun to be with but slightly older ones are such a pain!!

i have a lot of cousins who are much much younger than me and there was this stupid family get together thingy when i went to india last december and a few cousins flew in from other parts of the world!!! i had to spend a couple of days with a few 10 year olds!!! not fun at all!! i was ordered to be with them when i could have easily been bar hopping with some good 'ol frens.....

3:42 AM  
Blogger Demi Goddezz did the happy dance and finally said..

lol...today was my last day in school..and i was really sad i wont be seeing the kids again...I guess over the year the attachment grows...lol I loved the poopoo part..I havent dealt with the younger kids but yeah they are adorable

9:29 AM  
Blogger The Box did the happy dance and finally said..

I'dve thought The Mahi would've said it more like 'Dah-ling.'

12:43 PM  
Blogger the wannabe indian punkster did the happy dance and finally said..

ahhh, those kids...with their cute pigtails and bambi eyes.

somehow they seem to manage to melt chalu-sistahs hearts as well.

Its a conspiracy, I tell you.

1:21 PM  
Blogger Madame Mahima did the happy dance and finally said..

medha - shhhh i have my reasons!

minku babes nooo way im gonna join teaching!! hehe yea it was kinda better than the kindergarten teaching coz the kids so were slightly older and easier to handle!

aditya - yup its definitely a pain when you cant connect with the kids, no matter what age!

demi - oh yea u definitely get attached to a couple of cuties!

box - i tried to la but it didnt seem right with the little ones...'darling' seemed....right!

megha - damn the conspiracy and DAMN our biological clocks! DAMMIT!

9:38 PM  
Blogger Harjee Kapur did the happy dance and finally said..

read your feelings about kids as well.
a potent cocktail of pretensions, projections and reality.

me likes. and thinks mahi actually likes kids...


11:54 PM  
Blogger Ajay did the happy dance and finally said..

first time here, mahi...'soft in my old age'..haha..
ne way was kinda curious to read abt the worrier/eccentric...

1:39 AM  
Blogger Miz BoheMia did the happy dance and finally said..

You know, I love you and all but keep mentioning your HEIGHT and call yourself at YOUR age old and well, what am I then, chopped liver? Geez! ;-P

So funny sweet Ladee Mahi! Forgive me for laughing at your expense! I am sure the little kiddies miss their Teacher Mahi too!


2:46 AM  
Blogger Webmiztris did the happy dance and finally said..

aren't other people's kids great? when you can just say, "OK, I'm done!" and be rid of them? lol

8:38 AM  
Blogger Madame Mahima did the happy dance and finally said..

harjee - i shall neither confirm nor deny that =D

wellllcome ajay...hopefully you'll stick around longer to find out more about the worrier/eccentric bit! do visit again!

miz B - oh yummy mummy you stand much much MUCH taller than all of us here! dont let my paranoia and whining get to you i do not always mean what i say! i am vegetarian but i looooove this chopped liver!

dawn - LOL the best bit is i didnt have to deal with ANY poop at all! and that in itself was a tiny victory on its own, for me =D

9:29 AM  
Blogger Adrenjunky did the happy dance and finally said..

This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

9:18 PM  
Blogger Adrenjunky did the happy dance and finally said..

Mahi i can relate to your mixed sentiments about kids coz my feelings for them range between imparting a good thrashing to them to cuddling them all the time, i suppose only kids can make you feel that way, exception my big fat lab Modjo also makes me feel the same way.

9:25 PM  
Blogger Harjee Kapur did the happy dance and finally said..

:-) no need to my dear.
i know.
And you know i do :D

try working for an advertising agency mahi.
and see how overgrown kids go about their stuff.
you have no idea....

9:56 PM  
Blogger surbhi seth did the happy dance and finally said..

Hey Mahi! Didn't it remind you of those good days back in ILS... when we obedient brats would go, "TEACHER TEACHER" and crack the poor teacher's brain over the little (no)things we had to say, like... "He stole my pencil", or "X didn't do his homework"!!! Oh Oh!!! That reminds me of how much ILS kids would tell on each other! I remember this one time in 4th grade when I was reading an Asterix comic book while class was in session, and this girl got up and went and told the teacher! The teacher didn't only confiscate my lovely comic book, but she told me that if I wanted to get my book back, I'd have to see the principal first. Obviously the book was very important to me, so after class I made a trip down to the Principal's office... but despite the long lecture thrown in my face I never saw my Asterix again... that's right... she KEPT it!:(

2:34 AM  
Blogger that girl in pink did the happy dance and finally said..

hello MM! Harjee recommended your blog to me and here i am.

Hi Harjee!

so the little buggers managed to win you over eh? i know what you mean, i've been tricked into dropping my guard around them too.
the secret lies in getting some "away time" from them. i truly believe that when it comes to kids, a giant distance makes the heart grow fonder. :)
do drop by sometime, for a slightly different perspective on kids.

1:50 PM  
Blogger Madame Mahima did the happy dance and finally said..

hi adrenjunky! thanks for visiting =) soo true my feelings about kids sometimes vary to the extremes...but my dog kelso only brings out the loving side of (until he does something wrong...and i smack him. okay you were right. :P)
do visit again mate!

harjee - yucks the overgrown kids are the worst. they dont even have age as an excuse. pain-in-the-asses they are.

surbhi - LOL i know! we would go and whine to the teacher for EVERY LITTLE THING. omg i cant believe you didnt your comic back! thats just evil man..who was the cow who ratted on you?? (i hope it wasn't me...i dont recall ratting on anyone :S)

pink girl - welcome dahhhlink! i will definitely drop by your blog! you know you maybe right..ive realised with kids, sometimes they know when someones trying to get away and they just go all out to clingggggg to u!
thanks for visiting babe!

6:25 PM  
Blogger Rohan Kumar did the happy dance and finally said..

Guess she didnt get a lift and she must have been in need
So this is the advenutre of Mahi in the bus indeed
Oh she met a nose digger from from way over town
That didnt dig on MAHI

Now I aint sayin she a gold digger
But why's she have to call him a nosedigga
Get down Rohan u better get down
Get down Rohan u better get down

Well I guess I couldnt belie your heavy duty expectations :)

3:56 AM  
Blogger Madame Mahima did the happy dance and finally said..

rohan you can report to me later for you-know-what
so witty, HUH. :@

10:09 AM  
Blogger Casablanca did the happy dance and finally said..

Down with Rohan, down with Rohan!

*cheers from the side*

11:57 AM  

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