Actual Thoughts that have entered my head in the past week.

1. Why does my low fat brownie, ironically, taste like butter?
2. Time paradoxes. If I go back in time and say contaminate the timeline by say- accidentally murdering my grandad, then I cease to exist in this time. But if I didn't exist in the first place how was I able to travel back in time and kill my grandad? Think about it and say it with me now "Woah. W.t.f? Woah."
3. What does Kelso think of while he's awake? What goes on in that tiny prefrontal cortex of his?
4. Picturing myself throw an amazingly irritating groupmate off the 4th floor. But not before hitting her over the head with my text book first...and then crushing her with my heels ...then I throw her off the 4th floor.
5. I could quite possibly be PMS-ing.
6. How the hell did I get a full score on a memory experiment of all things!?? Mysteries of the Universe.
7. Why does it seem like I'm the only person who likes drinking an iced 'Banana Mocha'? My friend said it tastes like a laxative. I don't think it does!
8. My lecturer wears too tight pants. It looks terribly indecent. And no, I don't enjoy the view.
9. I think I might actually cry when I watch the last episode of 'Voyager'. I'm a geek. Sue me. (Please don't. I'm not rich.)
10. How some people can be so annoying. I'm being super nice by using the word 'annoying'.
11. Friday is gonna suck ass. Oh that's coz it's my 22nd birthday. What? You thought I was gonna be all coy and mysterious? Hell, NO! Address all cards, bouquets, jewellery to 'Madame Mahima'.
12. I could quite possibly be PMS-ing.
13. I'd love to say I'll have my phone switched off Friday night (what? I have to wake up for uni at 6 am the next morning!) so I'm not disturbed by the barrage (yea, right.) of phone calls and birthday wishes..but we all know I'm far too narcissistic to do that. My phone will be switched on and I will be waiting. Forget to call and you shall suffer the Wrath of Mahi.
14. A tarot card reader at a party said a guy will be entering my life around March/April. I will be waiting. He'd better not be like a cousin brother or something.
15. I am hungry.